What the waitress brings

First pair of pants - Ever!

2010-05-19T20:38:00.002-04:00

Pirate pants, for my favorite pirate:

The shirt says "pirates rule." And, I guess they do, since I made the pants first, even though what I'm really wanting to get to is a smocked dress. Lord only knows when I'll get to it, but when I do rest assured their will be pics.

(Who knows why this whole post is underlined? Not me!)

I sew need a deadline

2010-04-20T09:00:00.002-04:00

My whirligig blocks are multiplying at an abysmally slow rate. My last two quilts were finished in about two weeks time, but now that I'm working on something just for me, it is taking months. Interesting. So, I've taken a challenge presented by Jacquie at Tallgrass Prairie Studio: Spring to Finish. May 31 is the deadline to get your work done.

Perhaps the difference with the former two projects is that I was working toward a hard and fast birthday deadline. If so, this should be just the thing. I really miss my creative time in the sewing room, and now I have an excuse to get this quilt done. It looks so fabulous in my mind's eye - even the back is going to be amazing - that I really want to get the fabric cut and sewn.

I can't imagine that you found my blog without seeing Jackie's first, but if you've never experienced Tallgrass Prairie Studio you should check it out. She makes amazing quilts not too much like the ones your grandmother sewed at all. She inspires me.

While you were sleeping

2010-03-17T08:07:00.005-04:00

My Grandmother tells me that she suffered from insomnia, even as a child. Everyone in her family learned to wear slippers when they got up at night, because they were likely to land their bare feet upon freshly mopped flooring. An unpleasant feeling I suppose. She just felt the need to be useful, I suppose, even if everyone else was sleeping.

At 1 am I went looking for something to help me sleep. At 2 am I gave up and went upstairs to sew. I took this old torn, much brighter than the picture shows, orange towel:

Added some funky vintage fabric I got at an estate sale:

And made this funky little mat to go under the dishrack:

I've wanted something like this for a long time. It should soak up the dripy-drips while dishes dry, and it definitely brightens up the room. It will make me smile when I'm washing dishes. Can't beet that :)

Project of the day

2010-03-08T15:07:00.004-05:00

I have 9 quilt blocks so far. I really think this is going to turn out great.

Today, no time for quilt blocks, but I did make this little household necessity:

I used this tutorial at Crazy Mom Quilts. This time last year, check writing was so rare that I didn't keep a check book or even a register. But now, with kids in school, it seems we write checks quite frequently, so it seemed time to have a real way to keep up with them. Even though it is kind of an odious task, at least I'll smile when I see my pretty checkbook. You can make one, too. It took me about 3o minutes from start to finish.

Maybe it wasn't the first block?

2010-03-05T10:18:00.004-05:00

I found another whirligig tutorial at Quilting on Turtle Hill, and made a block from it. Here are the two side by side:

The first is from yesterday, the second is from this morning. Which one do you like better? Can you even tell a difference (besides the fabric)? There is a bit more angle to the whirl in the second one. Maybe, I'm nit-picking, but I think the second one has a bit more movement. And movement is what I'm after in this next quilt.

I have to say, Man, I love the internet. I'm learning so much from quilting and design blogs, that would have taken me years or decades to discover otherwise. Without a local quilting mentor, I would have really floundered and probably given up. But thanks to all the wise women willing to share, I think I'm making considerable progress with my art. So, THANKS!

Yesterday Jewel felt a bit cuddly when I needed to be up and about. She got so cuddly while I was holding her that I thought the sling might be the thing. So here we are:

She was quite happy to ride around with me while I did my chores.

What a difference a day makes

2010-03-04T16:05:00.002-05:00

Just a little time to sew and everything seems better. Is anyone else like that? Whatever the caes, this is the first block of the the new quilt.

I got to sew, today!

2010-03-04T11:28:00.003-05:00

I haven't had a second of my own for the last few weeks. But today, I found a few minutes that I used to sew this.

This is a just a practice block (done with scraps) before I start cutting into my fabulous new stash for the next quilt. This is a whirligig block. I used this tutorial over at Bitty Bird Quilts.

Even though I haven't been at the sewing machine, I've been mulling the next quilt over in my mind. I think it will alternate whirligig blocks with plain blocks, some of which I will applique. In my head, at least, it looks fabulous!

Now I just need a few hours to get started. It might be awhile, as Mr. Waitress is heading out of town next week.

dealing with anger

2010-03-02T14:48:00.004-05:00

********I very nearly removed this post. It isn't crafty, it isn't happy, it isn't anything a mother aspires to, but I decided to leave it, because I think so many if not most of us, have days like this. And, maybe it helps to know you aren't the only mother feeling this way. If it just leaves you thinking what a horrible mother/woman I am . . . well, I'm willing to take that risk. *********

Today is one of those days that just isn't going the way I want it to, and I can't stop being angry about it. Do you ever have days like that?

I don't know if good parenting skills are inborn, taught or personally developed. Probably some mixture of all three. Some days I do great, I roll with the punches, I make homemade soup and feed 8 more people than I expected, and still get the laundry done. Some days, like today, I feel like I am defeated before I even begin. Like around every corner, or with each next step is a new obstacle. I get angry because the day isn't going like I planned. Angry about things that are completely out of my control.

How can I manage this? How do you? I'm re-reading Buddhism for Mothers. But I need to do something more than read. I need an active way of changing my response to the world. Gotta run, more people to attend to . . .

Quilt's I'll never forget

2010-02-17T15:17:00.005-05:00

Last night was the February gathering of the local quilt guild. We had a speaker, Mavis Rosbach, of Quiltbird Studio. She gave a presentation titled "Three quilts you've probably never heard of, but I hope you'll never forget." Three fascinating stories. I'll tell you the first one now.

The first was about Elizabeth Gurney Fry.

A well-to-do British woman in the 1700s who decided not to live a life of leisure, but rather one dedicated to others. She trained some of the nurses who went with Florence Nightingale to aid the soldiers in the Crimean War, but she is better known for her work to improve prison conditions. Elizabeth worried especially for the welfare of women prisoners, and worked tirelessly to improve their lives. One of her most interesting and innovative, even ingenious projects involved teaching female prisoners to quilt. She gave them the supplies they needed to make a quilt when they set sail for the penal colony now known as Australia. The hope was that they would use the four months at sea to sew a quilt that they could sell upon arrival. Giving them a bit of dignity and a means to support themselves in this new land. One quilt survives to do this day, called the Rajah quilt, named for the ship the women sailed to their new home.

Here is the label on the quilt:

I have really not done justice to Mrs. Fry, but you can learn more here.

Loose ends, old and new

2010-02-14T17:30:00.006-05:00

Here is the heart block for the quilt guild. We meet this coming Tuesday. I'm happy to have something to bring to the meeting.

And here is the fabric I'm using for the next project (It was a birthday present from my Grandmother. )

It's from the Attitude Girls by Mary Engelbreit for Moda Fabrics. I've always been a fan of Mary Engelbreit, and used to really follow her work. I thought I'd outgrown her, but when I saw these fabrics I had a stroke of inspiration . . . We'll see if I can sew into the quilt the image I have in my mind. That's what I love about quilting, afterall.

Lastly, the smallest member of the family is having a little tummy trouble. Here is her dinner plate for tonight. I was hoping to find something she could eat and make her, and you, smile:

I love this guy

2010-02-04T17:10:00.002-05:00

Another quote from G. K. Chesterton about Mothering:

How can it be a large career to tell other people about the Rule of Three, and a small career to tell one’s own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone and narrow to be everything to someone? No, a woman’s function is laborious, but because it is gigantic, not because it is minute.
G.K. Chesterton, ”The Emancipation of Domesticity”, What’s Wrong with the World (1910)

I'm thinking I might need to read this book. Once again I found this on Solstice Letters. I haven't exactly figured out that blog, but it is full of great quotes.

To learn new things

2010-02-04T15:08:00.006-05:00

In January I joined the local quilt guild. I think I was one of maybe four ladies who don't get the senior citizen discount, but that just let me know there was enough experience in the room to help me learn something. And that is what I want. I've cobbled together my quilting skills over the years starting with the sewing my Grandmother taught me and then adding to it with the internet and a few books.

At the meeting they handed out instructions for a quilt block with the idea that everyone makes a block, brings it to the next meeting and then they raffle the blocks off to a few people who then have most of what they need to make a quilt top. I hope they do this every time. Since this blocks incorporates a couple of things I've never done before it is a good way to learn new skills.

This is what I have so far. Sort of a basket weave. It will attach to two appliqued semicircles to the sides to make a heart shape. At the top of the photo you can see another one of these blocks. I had to do it twice to get the pieces to line up. The second time worked out fine. So, you see, I am learning something. Maybe I'll use the first one to make a potholder.

The disappointing news for me, is that the fabric bundle I'd decided to buy to make my next quilt with is out of stock. Hmmm . . . . what to sew?

Where I've been all this time . . .

2010-02-02T23:15:00.007-05:00

I found this great quote from G. K. Chesterton over on a new-to-me blog, solstice letters (my first embedded link!):

Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, “Do it again”; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, “Do it again” to the sun; and every evening, “Do it again” to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we.

So much of my life is repetitive and monotonous. I didn't think anyone, anywhere would want to read about how many diapers I changed today, or how I washed the same laundry I washed just last week. As much as I'd like to, I don't always have creative projects on the cutting board or in the sewing machine. Sometimes my life is about kissing boo-boos and cleaning bottoms or a myriad of other surfaces. I sometimes have to remind myself that boo-boo kissing is a legitimate line of work. That although they may not realize it, everyone in the house is grateful for a clean potty to pee/poop/barf in. That just being present for my children is important in and of itself.

Then I read this quote, and I think there are mothers all over the world who feel just like me. And maybe just commiserating and celebrating our work here, on the internet, might be enough to help us keep our own daisies growing.

By the skin of my teeth

2010-01-31T08:42:00.005-05:00

I pulled the warm quilt from the dryer with just enough time to tuck it into a tissue paper filled bag and head to Grandma's.

In one day

2010-01-27T00:33:00.002-05:00

In one day I: finished marking a quilt, basted it, and quilted the entire thing. I also took out the garbage for pick-up (blessing upon the person who invented trash pick-up), washed, dried and folded two loads of laundry, and cooked dinner for my husband, myself, my sister and five kids.

So, if there are any typos in this post, please pardon me. I'm a little tired.

I can only hope the stitching will hold up for more than two washes. I'm a little nervous . . .

as promised

2010-01-26T09:36:00.005-05:00

This is the first quilt I've truely done from start to finish with patterns. On my other three there have always been significant parts that I either made up or I outright just flew (sewed) by the seat of my pants.

For the

quilting I'm using a heart pattern. Now, I'm not normally a heart kind of girl, but this quilt is for my Grandma. The woman who taught me to sew in the first place. So, for her, I'll do hearts.

If you look closely, you can see glasses I'm having to wear to get all this fine detail work done without headaches. I really hate them.

Here is a slightly more close-up view. I'm hoping to finish the marking for the quilting lines and get it basted before this evening. Ambitious, I'm afraid.

Scaredy cat

2010-01-25T17:09:00.003-05:00

There is nothing like taking the 326 piece quilt top you've just finished piecing together and drawing all over the top of it with a blue marker! (Photos to follow)

Given the sporadic nature of my posts, low readership shouldn't be surprising. But, I am thrilled to discover there is someone reading this pitiful, directionless, and sporadic blog - and she isn't even related to me! So, thanks, Meghan.

My latest . . .

2010-01-21T18:33:00.005-05:00

Well, blogger adds things in weird order sometimes. Here is the back of my most recent quilt. I did some straight line stitching alternating with free motion quilting:

Here is the front of the quilt. I must add that my husband greatly objected to these photos. He wanted to take them outdoors in the daylight in a more interesting setting. I however, just wanted pictures. Of course, now, I wish I had headed his advice. For your sake. Anyway, I think it turned out pretty well. Considering this was only my third quilt, and only the second one that was actually quilted (the first I tied). I'm well on my way to the fourth quilt. Maybe I'll get some photos of it posted, soon.

I don't know how big my readership is. I suspect it is zero - or one if you count me. I feel so ambiguous about this blog. On one hand I want it to be on par with one of the many amazing craft blogs I read. On the other hand, I'm just not that disciplined, and often find myself exhausted with other obligations. Time will tell I suppose.

Work in Progress Wednesday

2009-12-02T21:03:00.001-05:00

This is soon to be a reversible apron for Jewel. The brown side has an appliqued apple (my first machine applique), the other side has a pocket in the front. Jewel's birthday is in a few days, and she'll be getting a play kitchen. I think this is just the perfect thing from Mommy.

remember me?

2009-07-10T13:57:00.001-04:00

Clearly, I've been gone too long.

I've quit my job, joined facebook, and become a true stay at home mom. I'm going to try to reenergize my blogging efforts.

I apologize for the long absence, my adoring fans, but I'll try to post something interesting soon.

Weekend at the Lake

2009-03-08T20:47:00.006-04:00

Big brother is fast, and wears only the best racing gear:

Little sister hates her hat:

We're all a bit pink in the cheeks, but it was so wonderful to feel the sunshine.

With needle and thread my soul is fed

2009-01-26T19:58:00.005-05:00

Sew, for Christmas I got a fabulous new sewing machine, and sewing room.

Isn't it beautiful?

Sew, then I started making a quilt for Jewel. I made one for her brother when he was roughly her age. This time I have better tools and equipment, though.

Sew, this is the back ground (laid out sideways - sorry):

But, this is what all the pieces look like laid out. Last night, I sewed the tree trunk on. The rest will have to wait a bit.

Some of my earliest memories are of standing at my Grandma's side as she sewed for me. I would pull pins from the pin cushion and replace them for her. I pushed the pins deep into the cushion, thinking that I was helpful, but I know now that I was making it harder for her. I remember standing stiff as a board while I tried on dresses in progress, afraid to move lest I be stabbed by an overlooked pin. I still remember the hard and fast rules: 1) NEVER use the sewing scissors for anything else, and 2) you MUST WEAR SHOES in the sewing room - stray pins lurk about. I'm sad that none of those clothes she sewed so lovingly for me have survived. What has survived are the sewing lessons I gathered along the years. Because of the time spent, literally, at her feet, I can now sew for my children - and hopefully, my grandchildren, too.

As I sew, I think about my tools, my thread, the pins and needles I use. Many of them were castoffs of my Grandmothers. But, most my quilting supplies were a gift from my other Grandmother, Kathy. And most of my thread came from a lady I never, knew, named Wyzee (aka Fuzz). Fuzz never had children of her own, but as I was using her pins to hold pieces of Jewel's quilt together, I thought about how her blood (literally on the pins - ouch!) and sweat and devotion is being sewn into a blanket for the next generation. I quietly thanked her for so many of the tools that made my work easier. Although my children may remember my Grandmother, they will never know her. But, Liam already spends time at my side watching me sew, pushing the pins waaaay down into the cushion to help me. So, I'm hopeful that the skills and tools of my foremothers will continue to be used long after I am gone.

Ringing in 2009

2009-01-01T20:18:00.003-05:00

May this be a happy, safe, prosperous and healthy year for us all. Liam seems to have a head start!

God bless Dr. Ferber

2008-12-22T09:58:00.002-05:00

Thanks to Dr. Ferber and my own mother, I have had three nights of uninterrupted sleep. I think it has been at least two years since I've had a run even close to that. Mom kept Jewel overnight on Friday, her first night away from us. And the last two nights she has slept soundly all night long!

In certain parenting circles, Dr. Ferber is demonized as a let-your-baby-cry-it-out villain who is partly to blame for the moral decay of our society. But, when I was nursing a nearly-one-year-old all night long instead of sleeping, I knew that we would both be happier people if we were getting better sleep. So, I actually read Dr. Ferber's book, and discovered it was not authored by Lucifer nor published by the Hades Press, in fact, I think Dr. Ferber is considerate, and non-judgemental - allowing us to define problems ourselves. So off she went to her crib in her room. We were down to two wakings a night, and -- knock wood -- no wakings for the last two nights.

Thank you, Jewel, for my early Christmas present. In the words of Tiny Tim, God bless us everyone, and you too Dr. Ferber.

Outlasting a greyhound

2008-12-15T17:33:00.002-05:00

Here is one of the only pictures I have of myself on the Breast Cancer 3 day walk:

Also featured in the photo is my personal support crew. It was an amazing event, that I think I will participate in again in 2009. Obviously Breast cancer is a personal health concern to me, as well as something I council patients about on a daily basis. I met a great friend on the walk, who is keeping up with her own training and putting me to shame. So Jennifer, if your reading, we're still a team!

So in order to improve my own health, and to appear less hypocritical to my patients, I went for a run with my dog today. I estimate that I ran half of the distance and walked the other half. My greyhound, Stella, came along for emotional support and did well in her role. By wearing herself out she made me feel that perhaps I wasn't as out of shape as I feared. (Of course, greyhounds are sprinters, not distance runners, and granted I'm not a cat or a bunny) Although it wasn't a marathon, it was a start.

Anyway, I'm proud of myself, and I'm hoping to keep it up.

One year ago today . . .

2008-12-09T21:33:00.004-05:00

I gave birth to my darling Jewel at 3:02 in the morning. I did it without medication, without medical technology or prying eyes or hands. I did it with dignity and courage and love and the assistance of a few other loving family members. I did it in the privacy of my own home. It was just the way I wanted it to be.

Then, we had the most wonderful snuggle in our own bed, followed by a feast of a breakfast with the entire family in attendance to help us celebrate. I sat at the table, with my new babe in my arms, feeling a little tired, but mostly in awe of the wonderful new life among us. Thrilled to feel physically well after such an amazing travail.

Today we sang to her and I held her close. She has a cold today and doesn't feel well. Saturday we will have a small celebration of her first year earthside. I'm so grateful for her and so happy to be her Mommy. It's wonderful.

Tonight's bedtime snack:

Sleeping belle:

Round 12,378 of Jenny Vs "The Man"

2008-12-01T21:17:00.004-05:00

Remember this post?

Well, over the holidays I received a reimbursement check from the insurance company for said Home Birth! It took months of harassment, and prodding from me, but finally, an insurance company paid me!

One day, I'll have to post the story of her birth. Maybe when her birthday rolls around. It was, perhaps, the best day of my life. I can't think of any way in which it could have been better. And, now the icing, on the frosting, on the cherry, on the whipped cream of the most wonderful cake ever is that I got paid back.

Victory.

Thanksgiving carols

2008-12-01T21:08:00.003-05:00

Thanksgiving was wonderful, and just as it should be. The children serenaded us with Thanksgiving carols of their own composition. Sadly there is no audio, but this is the best photo I have:

There are musicians budding in our midst.

Thanksgiving was truly a time I am thankful for. We even reconnected with a side of the family I haven't seen in a long time.

Only 8 days until Julianna's birthday. I can't believe it has nearly been a year since that wonderful day she arrived. We must make preparations.

what we did today:

2008-11-11T19:22:00.004-05:00

Because Eric's office was closed for Veterans' Day and I happened not to be scheduled to work today, we took the children to daycare and had a day off together. It was the most time we have had alone since Jewel was born. We spent most of the day in Rome, but we did wander past this curious sign:

In case you don't have 20/20, it reads "Historic Site Meteorite Landing Circa 1998"

This is me in the hole created by said meteorite:

We had fun just toodeling around, not being interrupted by little vioces, or potty emergencies, or feeding schedules. We did just what we wanted, which renewed us, and refilled our well of patience so that we can handle the little voices, potty emergencies and feeding schedules more gracefully tonight.

We did it!

2008-11-10T20:38:00.002-05:00

Thanks to everyone who helped us across the finish line. As much as I hyped the 3 Day Walk, I feel badly that I haven't written about the actual event. Believe it or not, the closest thing I can liken it to is natural childbirth. It left me feeling like I could do anything. My mother, Joann, and I raised over $3000 between the two of us. As a group, the Atlanta Breast Cancer 3 Day raised 8.3 Million Dollars! That much money was raised by regular people like you and me. Astounding! Friends of ours walked in the San Francsico 3 Day, which raised over 5 Million Dollars (it was the first year in that city). Can you imagine?

I made a great friend on the walk, also named Jennifer. She and I cheered eachother on, remenicsed about Atlanta hotspots of the 1990s, and played games to get eachother through the tough miles. 20 miles, three days in a row is no joke, folks. It hurt! But we did it. I can't speak for her, but I got the impression that Mom's job as 3 day crew member was at least as hard as my job as a walker.

Last minute planner that I am, I didn't bring a camera. So as soon as I get photos from other people, I will post them. It was truly an amazing event, and a great example of how regular people like us can change the world.

Never doubt yourself, or your ability to make change in the world.

felting (but not in Felton)

2008-10-16T11:40:00.004-04:00

I've been taking stuff that looks like this:and turning it into stuff that looks like this:

A jewel in the squash

2008-10-09T20:35:00.002-04:00

The family that hays together

2008-10-05T18:58:00.002-04:00

.................NEWS FLASH.........................

2008-10-05T14:55:00.004-04:00

I've exceeded my fundraising goal for the breastcancer 3 day walk! Woohoo!

This is so exciting and such a relief to me! When it's all said and walked, I'll post photos. For now I am so pleased to be able to relax a bit, and focus on the final preparations and training.

For those of you who haven't gotten around to donating, there is no need to despair. You can still donate at www.jenny3day.info or better yet go to my mother's page (she is working as part of the breast cancer 3 day crew) at http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/Walk/AtlantaEvent?px=1924214&pg=personal&fr_id=1181 and donate there.

Hoorah to everyone who donated. Your generosity has not gone unnoticed.

I've joined the army

2008-10-01T09:52:00.002-04:00

The Army of Women, at www.armyofwomen.org

This is a partnership between women and researchers who will work together to discover the causes of breast cancer and how to prevent it.

Here is why this is important. There is only so much we can learn from animal studies (I know this from experience). Most current breast cancer research focuses on treating women who already have cancer. But wouldn't it be wonderful to find out what causes cancer in the first place so that we can prevent it from ever happening? That is what the Army of Women is trying to do. They hope to recruit ONE MILLION women willing to participate in various studies. Finding people to participate is one of the most difficult challenges many researchers face. The Army of Women will provide a large, willing pool of participants for researchers to draw from when they are doing an investigation. I've already signed up, I hope you and your friends and family members, coleagues and internet friends will too.

It is such an elegant and simple thing. You sign up as a volunteer. As new research projects come around they will send emails out looking for women with certain characteristics willing to participate. If you are interested, you let them know. It's that simple. You can do as much or as little as you want.

I've done this type of thing before for another study. It involved answering survey questions, and providing urine and blood samples. I've also donated saliva samples, cord blood samples, and breast milk samples for researchers. I'm probably a bit more gung-ho than the average Jane, but I feel these are small things I can do to help gain more insight into the bigger picture.

I'm so excited about this. I think this really is a way that we can all come together and make a difference. So, consider signing up. www.armyofwomen.org

A timely meme

2008-10-01T08:18:00.003-04:00

So I got tagged by a book meme by my mother at News of the Boobs. These are the rules:
* Grab the nearest book.
* Open the book to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post the text of the next two to five sentences in your blog along with these instructions.
* Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.
* Tag five other people to do the same

So the closest true book is. . . . . . . . . . . . .Josefina Javelina: A Hairy Tale, by Susan Lowell and Illustrated by Bruce MacPherson

There is no page 56, so I'll work with page 5.

"Pasadena!' she cried. That's right next door to HOLLYWOOD!" And she burst out singing: "Let me go where the grass is greener!
I'll pack my tutu and concertina
And hit the road to Pasadena!"

So there you have it. Not the glamorous life of the intellectual, but the life of a mother and son who got his first Library card yesterday. This is one of the books he chose to check out. The other, of course, was about pirates.

Sitting pretty

2008-09-29T00:42:00.000-04:00

I'm sitting here with a big smile on my face. I just figured out that I have less than $200 to raise to meet my goal to walk in the breast cancer 3 day. But the bigger, more wonderful thing that I just found, is that people have the opportunity to write messages to us when they make donations on line. I, somehow, was unaware of this until tonight and only discovered it because I'm not sleepy when everyone else is. Anyway, I just discovered a whole host of wonderful thoughts and blessings written to my mother and I. So many people had so many touching things to say to us and I've only just discovered it!

There are so many generous people in this world. I can't believe how much money we have raised together. It makes my heart happy to know that we are working together for some positive change in the world. It also makes me wonder what else we could achieve by working together.

kids on a cool slide

2008-09-18T20:36:00.000-04:00

Big brother helps Jewelie on the slide.

We went to A taste of Carrollton tonight. It was like some modern version of hunting and gathering, but it was delish.

Hip Momma

2008-09-16T20:56:00.000-04:00

http://www.ellabeebaby.com/Detail.bok?no=114

I made empanadas tonight. Mmmmm... I didn't even know what they were this morning, but tonight I think they taste like good Christmas food. Must be the cloves and raisins. Even the little boy ate it. Hey Mikey, He likes it!

Things seem so everyday here that sometimes I don't know what to blog about. The life of a stay at home mom can sound so unremarkable. I got the van serviced, I washed it and vacuumed it, I did the grocery shopping and made sure the trash made it to the curb before the truck came (Trash pick up is one of the true marvels of modern man - try living without it sometime), I made dinner. Who wants to hear about those things? We all want to believe that they just magically happen. It doesn't sound like an achievement, but I think anything that gets done with a baby on the hip is an achievement. But nobody ever won a Nobel Prize for household management as far as I am aware (not that I would even make the short list). Nonetheless, that is what I do most days.

Two days a week I still work in the clinic as a midwife. Sometimes those days are remarkable and other days routine. I'm constantly amazed at what women will put up with from their partners, as well as the burdens they can bear successfully and gracefully. In her book Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neal Hurston writes:

So de white man throw down de load and tell de nigger man tuh pick it up. He pick it up because he have to, but he don’t tote it. He hand it to his womenfolks. De nigger woman is demule uh de world so fur as Ah can see. Ah been prayin’ fuh it tuh be different wid you. Lawd, Lawd, Lawd!

Now, I'm not trying to get into a discussion on race relations, or feminism. I just think Janie's grandmother (the speaker), sums things up so well in this part of the book. Sometimes it really does seem that women, and especially poorer women, bear the heaviest burdens in society. And yet, women, I believe, have the greatest responsibility in society - rearing children, shaping and molding the future of the world. So often with the most minimal of resources. What is the best way to help? I help where I can, but I want to make change on a grander scale. One to one in the office, doesn't feel like enough for me, anymore.

To that effect, I stopped by the Obama/Biden headquarters in town today. No yard signs are available, but supposedly they'll call me when they are. I've never been excited about a political race, because I never saw anything that looked different from what we've always had. But this time, I have hope.

What I've been up to

2008-09-04T22:02:00.000-04:00

So here is a picture Eric took of me today with his (gasp!) iPhone:

Of course, it's the end of a long work day, my makeup has rubbed off, and I'm sitting inside Gloria, the minivan. But there are a few things you can see here that are different about me (other than the crows feet):

I've colored my hair a bit darker than it grows, and I've a tiny little sparkle in my nose.

You may wonder if there is trouble in paradise. The girls at work think I've lost my mind. They only see me in my professional role, and have no idea that there is more to me than a mommy/midwife.

Truth is, that way back when I was a little girl, I remember seeing Indian women who had jewelry in their noses. I thought that they looked so exotic and beautiful and feminine. Just like the lady I so vividly remember who talked with my mother at an English Country Dance. As they conversed I was entranced by the ivy that wrapped so beautifully around her delicate wrist. It was the first tattoo I ever noticed and the most beautiful, as well. Isn't it interesting the things that make impressions on us when we are young?

So I've wanted to do this for years, decades even. About eleven years ago I made a list of things I wanted to accomplish in the next year, and then in the next 5 years. I went on with life and then found the list a few years later - do you know there was only one outstanding item on the list? With this in mind, I started a new list. Getting my nose pierced was one thing on it. I plan to change the jewelry to something a bit more subtle once it is healed. But, just as with earrings, it seems there is "starter" jewelry you wear in the beginning.

There are few interesting things I've noticed since I did this last Thursday (ooh- a week ago). A)the ladies I work with don't have any idea about my real personality B)Neither my son or my mother seem to have noticed C)There are at least two other mom's at Liam's church pre-school that have visible facial piercings and they don't look creepy or weird at all.

Perhaps the this whole post is frivolous, but something even more frivolous is my excitement not about the republican national convention broadcast tonight, but the first episode of 90210! It's strange to say, but it's like an old friend is back in town.

One last cool thing that's going on in my life right now. Yesterday I was piddling around in a tiny little antiques shop a few miles from home, when I found something that looks a lot like this:

This is a birthing stool from the early 1800s in America. Women sat on them, pulling upward on the handles as they pushed new life into the world. Despite the fact that I thought I was fed up with midwifery and working in women's health, I'm captivated by this odd little chair I found in a backwoods antiques market. I want the thing so badly. I feel like it is a link to the sufferings and joys of countless women and the midwives who attended them in their travail. I think I just have to have it. It seems like a ridiculous thing to spend money on, but then so is jewelry in your nose.

I'll let you know if I buy it.

Julia Childs, again

2008-08-27T21:13:00.000-04:00

Who would have thought that avacado, tuna, red bell pepper, and lemon could turn out edible? Dang it! -- It was even good! I'll happily eat leftovers tomorrow. I can't believe I liked it. I can't believe I even tried it. Most of all, I can't believe I made it.

Obviously, people can change.

In other news, Julianna is crawling. Only a few paces at a time, but she is crawling. Three teeth now, two on bottom and one on top, but I think the other top tooth should break through very soon. I'll try to get a photo posted soon.

Liam will start a new preschool next week. I hope he likes it.

In other news, I am 1/3 of the way to my fundraising goal for the 3 day.

In other news, I think I have decided to move on career-wise. I just don't know when the big day will be. I'm reading (portions of) the book, Do What You Are, which was recommended to me by a friend. It uses the Myers-Briggs personality types to help you figure out what careers and work environments are typically good for you. So, I'm stewing on that for now. Giving extraordinarily serious thought to being a stay at home mom. Hmmmm . . . Back to the people can change thing.

It takes a village

2008-08-20T20:36:00.000-04:00

Geeze - how do single parents do it? Or even just couples who live far from family?

Tonight I got to talk with a very dear friend (she caught Jewel) that I haven't spoken with in a while. However, it meant that Eric put Jewel to sleep and Mom, God bless her, stepped up and got Liam ready for bed. When I got out of the tub, she was reading a night-night story to him.

Here it is 8:30 and I can barely hold my eyelids up. We all need a village - I really think we do.

Fund raising

2008-07-29T21:36:00.001-04:00

I first must say thank you to all the generous people who have donated to our efforts to participate in the breast cancer 3 day walk. What a lot of people don't know about this huge event, is that not only do the participants walk 60 miles over the course of 3 days, but each and every walker raised a minimum of $2200. You can't actually walk if you don't raise at least that much money. Although it is an athletic event, it is a fundraiser at the core. So far, I've raised 23% of my goal. So I do have a long way to go.

I have never been involved much in fundraising, so I'm not so sure how to go about it. If anyone has any ideas, skills, talents or resources that would be helpful in this endeavor, I would appreciate your help immensely.

I'm walking, in preparation too. So if you see me walking in the area, please try not to run over me, say a prayer for all of us, and perhaps make a donation to the cause. There is a t-shirt for sale, that says "Now that we've made it ok to talk about breast cancer, let's make it unnecessary." That sounds like a fabulous goal to me. I think you have to be sixteen to participate in the walk. I hope that a cure has made the walk a moot point by the time my children are old enough to participate. Just imagine it!

My thanks and gratitude to all who have assisted me thus far. Pray I can reach the financial goal, and the very real finish line this October.

Peace

We have a logo

2008-07-17T21:31:00.000-04:00

So, I'm trying to find people and companies willing to sponsor me in the breast cancer three day walk. As part of this effort I'm going to try to sell spots on a t-shirt that my team will wear while we are training and then walking in the 3 day in October. Yesterday, Eric and I came up with a logo for our team:

(for some reason the colors are wrong here on Blogger. Our logo is the same color as those other golden arches with black text. I think it loses the effect in blue :( )

Being the breastfeeding mother-loving last-name-mcdonald midwife freak that I am, I find this hillarious. I just hope other people aren't too embarrased to put their names or company logos next to it!

Don't you think baby onesies with this on it and "frequent diners club" under it or "open 24/7" would be so punny? Or am I just a nutjob? I guess the two aren't mutually exclusive. Anyway, now it is up to me to start approaching others and asking for money. The only folks I've been successful with in that department are Mom and Gramma. They can't fund the whole thing, so I better get to work on a new skill set.

A repost from my response to an article on Babble.com

2008-06-23T23:19:00.000-04:00

See the original article here.

This is becoming a big issue right now, because the American Medical Association is considering a resolution that proposes individual state legislation to prevent home birth. This is driving me mad with anger. I consider their actions an affront to my personal privacy and my rights as both a woman and a citizen of the world. What if I told all the AMA members that they can only have bowel movements on Sunday and only when supervised by someone adequately trained to assist them? Sometimes I get so fed up that I have to say something. After I read the article, I had to post a comment. I'm thinking of sending a modified version of this to the editors of some newspapers, and perhaps the American Medical Association, and a few other "health professional organizations." Perhaps the poop reference should be avoided, so here is my more official sounding write-up. I'll be looking for links to the referenced statistics. I'll provide them to you as I find them.

There are plenty of good studies to show that planned home birth for low-risk mothers is as safe as or safer than giving birth in the hospital. Check the British Medical Journal for one of the best studies. I believe it was 2005. Most of the women in the world give birth outside of the hospital. The countries with the best maternal and infant mortality rates utilize midwives more and often have a larger percentage of their babies born at home.

Somehow, the human race survived prior to the advent of maternity wards.

Sometimes bad things happen. Simply spending millions of dollars, and giving birth in a hospital doesn't prevent bad things from happening. The United States spends more money on health care than any other country in the world, but our maternal and infant mortality statistics are near the bottom of the list of industrialized nations. In fact, the number of women in the US who die as a result of pregnancy or childbirth is rising. So clearly, hospitals and money alone are not the answer.Instead of crying wolf over the five percent of women in this country who have their babies at home, perhaps our energy would be better spent lowering the c-section rate, improving infant and maternal mortality rates, discovering the reason for and rectifying racial disparities in these rates, and giving women both the right to choose where to birth and dignity and respect during the process.

Rock on Madeline!

The government is working!

2008-06-17T22:13:00.001-04:00

So, Mom got her passport in ten days.

Jewel's social security number arrived today. Exactly one week after I applied for it. Now we can file our taxes (I know that few people look forward to that, but it will be a load off, and hopefully a return - oh and an economic stimulus check would come in handy,too.)

You just wouldn't believe how excited I am. I have spent HOURS working on this and her birth certificate. I feel like I finally achieved something.

On Father's day we decided that the whole famn damily is going on a cruise in July. Really, I'm so excited - mostly that we are ALL going (Eric's parents and my Mom), but also that someone else is going to cook and clean for me for 7 days, AND I will get to go new places and see new things. I feel so lucky that I have married into a family that I enjoy spending time with and being a part of. I feel even luckier that they have not only accepted me as one of their own, but my crazy and complicated family, too.

Here are a couple of Father's day photos for ya:

That last one is from a series that I started when Liam was four months old, for Eric's first Father's Day. There is a picture each year with a letter, that all go into a five-photo frame to collectively spell DADDY. If I had the other photos on the computer I'd post them. The changes over the last three years are unbelievable. Of course, this was the first year with TWO children in the picture. And let me tell you, getting two to hold the letter right way, look at the camera with their eyes open and look like they were perhaps enjoying the moment, was no small feat.

Hope this finds you all well. Jenny

When I'm feeling blue

2008-06-12T22:13:00.000-04:00

All I have to do

Is check out the interspecies snorgeling link on http://www.cuteoverload.com/

If one of the posts there doesn't make you smile then the Underlord of Darkness must have stolen your soul and replaced it with quickcrete.

Be sure to check out the wallaby and the sloth.

What I have in common with Julia Childs

2008-06-11T21:56:00.000-04:00

"I was thirty-two when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate."
— Julia Child

So, in the interest of family health, I am endeavoring to learn to cook. So far, I've made a few different dishes, all of which people were willing to eat, and occasionally more than one serving. I've done a few things for the first time recently: chopped a red bell pepper, used cumin (does anyone know what that is?), been excited about buying measuring cups, eaten something I knew had red bell peppers in it, longed for new measuring spoons (fancy ones I saw with pretty flowers on them), just poured directly into a pan without measuring, and liked the taste of food that I knew had carrots and red bell peppers in it.

These achievements may sound like small potatoes to some of you, but you must realize this is written by a woman who didn't try pepper or mustard (let alone spicy mustard) until she was in her mid-twenties. I was essentially raised by two women with stomach ulcers. The only seasonings I grew up with were salt, and parsley. Speaking of parsley, I've never figured out what it adds to a dish other than little green flecks.

So you can see that I am a true beginner at this. Prior to the culinary adventures of late, I could only claim to be a moderately good grilled cheese sandwich chef, with occasional successful ventures in baking. To everyone else this may all seem elementary, and perhaps you are thinking that I have taken on this responsibility a bit late in life. Perhaps you are right. None the less, I have.

Once, I hated cooking. It seemed only like a necessity, the same way that peeing and breathing are required for existence. Perhaps there were some meals better than others (especially if someone else was cooking), but really it was just about sustenance. Now, I have taken on a new attitude. Cooking is becoming an act of love. A minor holy event. A time that I can ease health and the spirit of caring into the bodies of those who mean the most to me, rather than forcing convenient toxins down in haste. It is a strange and new meditation for me. A wonderful new lesson in the many ways of loving.

I think I can quit one of my part time jobs

2008-06-11T20:01:00.000-04:00

Two things that the state seems to have a hard time reconciling:

And

Finally, after taking on the task as if it were a part time job, and when Julianna was six months and one day, we got her birth certificate. I had two or three people at the state department of vital records and two or three people at my local office working on this one project. Despite the fact that it took six months to coordinate everyone's efforts, we all worked together and on Monday we were issued, not one but two official copies of her birth certificate at no charge! It was refreshing to receive true service at a government office (more than one, actually).

Mr. Blue bird's on my shoulder

2008-05-28T06:19:00.000-04:00

It's the truth! It's factual! Everything is satisfactual!

Jewel and I both slept through the night! And so did Liam, and Eric, and the dogs.

From 11 pm to 5:45 am I had a shocking affair with the sandman while my children slept snug in their beds. It feels scandalous.

One crafty bitch, aka SuperMom

2008-05-20T20:54:00.000-04:00

So, I promised Liam his own superhero cape . . .

I designed the whole thing myself, made my own pattern, and got to use new features on the most badass sewing machine ever. I enjoying sewing these types of crafts the most. There are no instructions to follow, I just make them up as I go. Sewing is so cool because you get instant gratification. You can see it happen before your eyes. I love it.

I'm pretty pleased with this. Liam must be too, because he is sleeping under it like it is a blanket.

I have to give props to my own supermom. She held Jewel so I could sew, and even cooked me dinner, since I felt puny.

Here is baby Jewel doing the laundry, just a few days ago:

Remember I said I'd been inspired?

2008-05-18T21:48:00.000-04:00

Well, the sewing machine fairy (aka my Mom, Joann) came to my house last night. She brought a new singer sewing machine. It has amazing new details. Things that may have become standard sometime in the last fifty years since my old machine was manufactured. I'm sure it was state of the art, at the time, but wow! I love all the touches this new machine has.

Anyway, I've completed my first project. It is a wall hanging for my niece Mariah. It is my prototype for one I plan to make to hang in the kids' playroom at home. I'm probably a little more proud of it than I should be:

The yellow in the back ground is the new color in our now lovely kitchen :)
Here is the M up close:

And the tassel at the tip:

So, although I took the inspiration from somewhere else, I did completely design this little flag on my own. My next idea is to sew a superhero cape for SuperLiam and then perhaps the fantastic flag I'm planning for our play room.

You'll never convince me my kids aren't cute

2008-05-18T21:21:00.001-04:00

how much is too much

2008-05-13T15:27:00.000-04:00

As a mother, I feel compelled to save those certain items of childhood importance. Saving things has always been a bit of a compulsion for me. As a teenager I saved my sisters' school work and art projects that I felt were underappreciated by our parents. I put the exceptional pieces on my bedroom door for display and admiration. Now, I have two children of my own and have to determine how much of their physical childhood should be saved and how much is too much.

About ten days ago, my son lost his last pacifier. This boy is 3 years old and has been quite attached to this little piece of plastic for nearly all of those three years. He has horded them

(perhaps my compulsions were passed on to him), hidden them strategically, and mostly been comforted by them. So when we couldn't find the last one last Saturday night, it seemed like an awful, if predictable, tragedy. We looked high and low, under every Thomas the Train track and in every one of Spider Man's webs, but couldn't find it. That night, fortunately, he was too worn out from playing to make too much of a fuss. But the next night - was a true mourning. He's old enough that he understood just how gone it was, but still baby enough to be really sad. He came back downstairs and broke my heart with his very sad tone of voice when he said "Mommy, I need something to suck on." It was as though he understood that the little piece of silicone and plastic comforted him, and he would take any substitute available.

Somehow he (and I) made it through that night. And the next. And the next. He hasn't mentioned it for days and is doing just fine. Then yesterday, I was changing the sheets on my bed and I heard it land with a slight thud on the floor.

So my question for you is this - What do I do with it? Obviously, I'm not giving it to my son. It would be a cruelty to ask him to go through that withdrawal twice. I called my mother just after the discovery and she said "Throw it away - quickly - before he finds it." My response was that it felt like I was throwing away his best friend. I couldn't do that.

I have a friend, who discovered among her mother's belongings the little rings that were used in her brothers' circumcisions. I know someone else whose family kept the caul (aka amniotic sac) that a baby was born in. These seem like examples of sentimentality gone awry - possibly gone biohazard! But, who am I to judge, I have a placenta in the deep freezer! It took me 2 1/2 years, a new pregnancy, and a bucket-full of tears to bury Liam's placenta (that's another story - I don't think I'm quite as strange as that makes me sound).

So for now, I guess I'll keep it hidden in a drawer too high for my 3' 1" charmer to see into. And think of a plan before he gets much taller.

Inspirations: where we find them

2008-04-29T20:59:00.000-04:00

At the fabric store this afternoon I found a piece of fabric that I absolutely love. It may become the inspiration for redecorating the kids playroom (aka dining room). I bought a length of the fabric to bring home and stare at, ponder over, be inspired by . . . I've had tons of ideas, but most of them involve the sewing machine. I called today to find out what it would cost to have it tuned up, so to speak, and was shocked to hear it would cost $69! I think I can buy a new one for $20 bucks more. Or find a great used one in a pawn shop. My sewing skills are minimal, so it is hard for me to justify that much money on a machine. I guess I'll just keep on pondering . . .

My son is having a hard time at school, so we had a parent/teacher conference today. The image he paints for us is a bleak one of damp, dark corners, cold porridge, and dim-witted bullies. I was even contemplating letting him move back to the class he just graduated from. His teacher, however, told us that his troubles are only the typical ones that all new kids experience upon moving up. He is neither a bully nor the kid whose lunch money is stolen daily. She felt like going from being the oldest, most mature child in class to the youngest and most immature child in class is often a hard transition, but certainly far from fatal. So now, we have to enforce better bedtime schedules, make sure he stays well and find a way to inspire him to like school again. Just a few little things . . .

I read an article on CNN today about how average people are making money publishing articles on the internet. Not exactly as professional freelance writers, but as amateurs with poor punctuation. It was actually interesting and thought provoking for me. For a few years now, I've though there might be a way for me to use my English degree along with all the other various and sundry experiences of mine to earn a little money or perhaps just the pleasure of my name in a by-line. I've even written a couple of pieces but have never submitted them to anyone. Perhaps I'll be inspired to try that soon . . .

Stupid TV (said with a teenage foot stomp)

2008-04-16T21:45:00.000-04:00

Right now, there is this perfectly horrible show on pbs called "The truth about cancer" I watched it for nearly an hour and a half, before I decided that this producer/director's "truth" is that we all die. A lot of us from cancer. When I was only about 10 or 20 minutes into this show, I realized I probably wasn't going to learn anything I didn't know from it. Still, I felt compelled to watch it - what if the key to my Mother's cancer (or just some fabulous idea about how to live better with it) is in this show? If I don't watch I might miss it. Its ridiculous, I know. My compromise is to leave the tv on downstairs and then come upstairs to do make this post (and to eat a little cup full of my chocolate yogurt concoction that cures all).

I can't fix cancer, I know that. I also know that isn't my job (thank God for that, eh?).

Since I named this about drinking whatever the waitress brings, I'll point out that we made some lovely progress on our back porch. We now have festive lighting, a flowering plant, and lovely seating for four adults and one greyhound mix. I'm looking forward to warmer weather so that I can enjoy this reclaimed space with the ones I love. If I can get as smart as my mother is about computers and camera's I'll try to take a picture.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Hopefully, I'll be making new friends and knitting shawls and blankets for folks who need them in the process.

Getting started

2008-04-12T22:48:00.000-04:00

New beginnings, everyday is an opportunity, a choice to maintain the status quo or to begin afresh.

Some of those around me have suggested (I dare say nagged) that I should create a place for some of my thoughts. Whether these thoughts are really worth publishing, or simply a rather public diary, I can't say. Today I felt inspired to create this spot.

We all have roles that change throughout our lives. At times I've been a musician, an outsider, a sorority girl, the smart one, a nurse, and a semi-professional student. Currently, I'm a wife, a mommy, a midwife, a daughter, and a breast cancer crusader. The future is plastic and ever-changing. What shall I be next?

Come with me and help me discover.